Friday, January 02, 2009

100 Burpee Cookie



We are pretty Paleosexual around our house these days. What? You don't know what Paleosexual means? Well, roughly defined it's adhering to a lifestyle based around Gluten-Free Paleo/Zone eating and short, intense Crossfit style exercise. (It's also pretty much the inverse of eating low-fat and training to be a triathlete.) Even my three year old daughter asks for her daily fish oil dose at breakfast.

But alas, once in a while we do want ourselves a bit of the WHITE DEATH. And once we've had even a little taste, we are like a den of those creepy zombies in "I Am Legend."

What are we to do?

My wife Juliet hatched the idea of going absolutely sugar free (no sweet, cake, cookie, ice cream, etc) till the end of April (her birthday).
She has even started a Facebook group called "Jesus Hates Sugar". (He would you know.)

The out? You can PRE-pay for one sweet item on the same day you plan to indulge by performing 100 consecutive burpees (with a jump and clap over-head at full extension).
The Pre-Payment shame has to be done on the day of, and cannot be credited to a day in the future. The burpees expire at midnight.
You also can't spread the burpees out over the course of the day in an attempt to ameliorate their heinousness. Burpees done at a Crossfit workout also don't count.

I tested the burpees for cookies system yesterday and have to tell you that in order not to become fiercely sweaty, you should plan on at least 15-20 minutes to complete the task.

Was it worth it? Let us know. It's about an even trade. Two cookies by the way? That would be 200 burpees.

Are you in? If you are, skin that pony and post to comments.

Happy White Death Free New Year!

Coach Kstar

15 comments:

Anonymous said...

Will burpee for cookies . . .

I'm in!

Steven

Roop said...

So only rule is..eat something with sugar, do 100 burpees/item, correct?

So In...

Anonymous said...

20 minutes of hell for 20 seconds of bliss? I'm gonna have to pass. Burpees suck. No cookie for me :(

kitty

P.S. Paleosexual, love it! But not sure I'm gonna tell my co-workers that's what I am- they'll think I'm even weirder than they already do with my huge bag of meat and veg that I bring to work everyday ;)

Melliefarrell said...

I tried the no sugar thing for a few weeks, fantastic feeling of success! I'm down!

P.S. Jesus DOES hate sugar!

Roop said...

Due to my inability to maintain weight and even gain any, I will have to take back my RSVP.

Very tough to maintain 25 blocks without my dairy. Unless anyone else has a suggestion.

Anonymous said...

Roop, your inability to gain or maintain weight is 100% due to not eating enough. It is very hard to put on weight following a strict Zone diet. You need more calories. Way more. Milk is the way. Don't give it up. Instead, drink a gallon of whole milk a day on top of what you are eating. Supplement your gluttony with a proper Starting Strength style training regimen and then tell me that you can't put on weight. I'm 30 lbs heavier than I was 8 months ago and I've got another 20 to go. Be aware that your Fran time might suffer a bit during this process.

My gym (CFO) is doing a similar "challenge" with regard to sugar. The CFO version is even a bit more extreme in that people are trying to avoid any foods that have any added sugar or artificial sweeteners. Does your restaurant's salad dressing have sugar in it? Better not eat it then... Good times.

I think such challenges are a bad idea. I don't really eat desserts as it is, so going cookie (or cake or ice cream) free is pretty easy for me. I can't tell you the last time I had a cookie. It may have been as long as 6 months ago. Despite that, I think that if you don't eat many sweets now, you will be unlikely to see any performance gains as a result of forgoing your once-a-week bowl of ice cream. You may, however, make yourself unhappy and spend even more time obsessing about food. Eat, drink, lift and be merry.

Unknown said...

You should have had a bigger cookie!

Unknown said...

Ok so crossfit always likes equations like F=M*A
Well I did some mathmagic and.

(100burpees/20 minutes)=(>1 cookie)

1 cookie=happiness
100 burpees= pain and nausea

ergo
pain and nasea = happiness

???
how is that for a mind fuck.
I will never enjoy cookies if I associate them with burpees.

Steve Caddy said...

TomC - food obsession is bad for sure, but having a little fun fucking with yourself can be a good thing too. It's all in the approach. ;)

I'm in remotely if you'll let me (I'm a distant SFCF fan from Melbourne, Australia).

AngieDSimplyMe said...

I think its a great idea... and I requested to join the Facebook Group...

Anonymous said...

Where does beer fall in on this deal?

Andrew Philips said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Andrew Philips said...

Aneel,

I think your math was slightly off:

100burpees/20min + 1 cookie = 0 net gain or loss.
1 cookie = -100 burpees/20min

So, 1 cookie (with all its pleasure) is the opposite (negative) of all that pain and nausea (100 burpees/20min).

- Andy

PS: This also has the weird result that -1minute = 5cookie*burpees. I don't know what a cookie*burpee is, but apparently, if you can put 5 of them together, you go back in time one minute! Does this mean cookies and burpees are some backdoor to the fountain of youth? Ahh, only if it were so.

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