Tuesday, February 05, 2008
Happy Fun Ball
This rubber band ball costs a whopping $2.49 at Office Max. You could of course make your own, but either way get your hands on one as soon as you can.
I have spent the better part of the last five or six years looking for the perfect ball on which to roll my sore, bound down, dysfunctional, tight, nasty bits. I've tried tennis balls, field hockey balls, mini-medicine balls, balls with spikes, and dog chew toys. Nothing works as well as this little wonder.
So, you've got one? Good. Let's start working.
Find a very hard chair or bench. Place the miracle ball under your bum where your hamstrings insert onto your pelvis. Crush and smash anything that is painful.
Lay on the ground, on your side. Place the happy fun ball on the side of your hip right above the most bony part of the side of your upper leg. Not sore there? Find something that is and roll baby.
There is no, one right way. Find something that hurts and smash it.
It is ok to pre-medicate. You may need wine, or a finger or two of good irish whiskey.
Set the clock and keep rolling for 5 minutes. Get as much done as you can.
Good luck, and buy one for a loved one.
Ps. Don't taunt happy fun ball.
at 8:56 PM